Technically this could be construed as my fault, after Lucca went with me to a client’s art opening a few years ago.  The central piece of the exhibit was a beautiful, supersized hand, making the “okay” sign, the ultimate symbol of peace and spirituality in the artist’s native India.

Except that I had to laugh.  “Hmm, wonder what someone from Brazil would think seeing this?”

“Why,” asked Lucca.

“Well, the ‘okay’ sign means something very different in Brazil.” In fact, it’s the cultural cousin of the middle finger in the US.

Now fast forward four years to Friday night pick-up from school…

“I got sent to the vice-principal’s office today,” Lucca announced.

“Why?” I asked?

“I didn’t do anything.”

Of course.  “Just tell me exactly what happened.”

“It started with the book we were reading aloud in study group, that said someone was a ‘born artist’. My friend thought it said ‘porn artist.’ The other said ‘no, I said born artist,’ to which he said, ‘Oh, well that’s ‘okay,’ and made the ‘okay’ sign with his hand.”

Lucca continued, saying that he was only being helpful, by letting his friends know that the “okay” sign meant something different in Portuguese.  That led the boy of Italian heritage to show the Italian cultural equivalent (running one’s fingers from back to front under his or her chin), which caused the child of Russian heritage to pronounce, “Hey, that’s the same thing in Russia!”  Then someone asked the boy of Korean descent if he was familiar with the pinky sign, and he shared that was actually attributed by most to being Chinese, but in reality was Chinese-American.

Possibly after spying my smile as I listened to the story, Lucca, now indignant in defense of his innocence, proclaimed “there’s a religion in Southeast Asia where it’s sacred to read using the middle finger as a pointer…would you deprive someone reading in Southeast Asia because the middle finger is vulgar in the US?”

But herein lies the problem of thinking it’s funny. This is the same child who noted that curse words are a social construct…that words themselves cannot be right or wrong…it’s the intent with which the word is used that makes it “good” or “bad.”

To which I say yes and no.  While age 10 renders “because I’m the mommy” ineffective as the end all reason to stop discussion, I will say this:

We live in a pluralistic society where people agree to abide by certain rules to live harmoniously in society, and one of those rules is that we won’t make vulgar hand gestures to one another at school.”

End of story, right?  Until tonight, when he says “but they’re not vulgar in the US, the society we live in, so how can that be pluralistic if people haven’t agreed in the society where the incident took place?”

Help.  I’m in trouble.  Anyone?  Got anything?

When I saw the Cricket transit ad, “Todo el Poder de Android a una Fraccion del Precio,” I knew it said “all the power of Android, at a fraction of the cost.”  But as I looked around me—on a busy corner of downtown Chicago during the after-work rush—I wondered how many others did.  And if they didn’t know what it said, wasn’t that a waste of good advertising dollars?  Placing an ad in Spanish in the middle of downtown Chicago, what I would think of as general market?

First, a note on my underlying assumption here about the number of Spanish speakers in Chicago (I assumed low, hence not a worthwhile expense).  As it turns out, the number of Spanish speakers in Cook County matches the number of English only speakers:  each represents one third of the total population.  That said, just because one can speak Spanish, doesn’t mean one does.  The 2000 Census showed that while one in ten households spoke a language other than English at home in IL, half of those also identified as speaking English—meaning that only 5% of the total population actually didn’t speak English (with Polish and Spanish being the top alternatives).

Second, a note about research:  you get what you ask for.  What started as a curiosity about effective multicultural marketing turned into a question posed on Facebook:  “If you don’t speak Spanish, how do you feel if you see a Spanish only ad in general market (e.g. during prime time TV or on a bus billboard.) If you do speak Spanish, how do you feel?  Asking for feelings, the conversation that ensued reflected positions on the essence of USAmerican values:  immigration and assimilation vs. free market capitalism.

Ken said seeing an ad in Spanish might dissuade him from buying that product. “…It comes down to the strong belief that if a person immigrates to a new country, they should be fully assimilated by striving to learn the language and culture.” He adds that “If we provide information and advertisements in a different language, then what is the incentive to be part of the USA culture?”

Michael countered, however, that “Business has to do what it must to reach its market.”  Jennie agrees.  “Ads in Spanish are capitalism in action…and ain’t that America?” 

On the topic of pure capitalism, Verizon cites the powerful market potential in diversity:  “The estimated purchasing power of African-Americans, Asians, Hispanics, gays and lesbians, and people with disabilities will be more than $ 2.5 trillion by 2010.”

Why refer to Verizon?  Well, that brings us back to the original question as to whether the Cricket Ad in Spanish on a bus in downtown Chicago was actually effective or a good use of dollars to reach the Hispanic market there.  In moderating the conversation on Facebook, I shared, from memory, that the question was inspired by a Verizon cell phone ad. 

I remembered it was a cell phone ad.  The ad was in Spanish.  Therefore it must have been Verizon, right?  That’s because in my mind, Verizon “owns” the Hispanic market in Chicago.  “We speak customers’ languages and participate in the celebration of their lifestyles’ cultures,” says Verizon.  And, indeed, you will see Verizon as a sponsor at the International Latino Film Festival in Chicago, you can make free international phone calls from their booths at Chicago festivals, and meet their leadership on boards of Hispanic and Latino related organizations. 

In a world where one can be friends with their Mayonnaise on Facebook if they want to, Cricket’s fly-by-night ad, while in Spanish, does not go the extra step to actually engage with the target market where they are.  Ultimately, this Spanish language ad in general market ends up speaking to neither:  it misses the connection to the former, while potentially alienating the latter.

As I settle into a new position with an organization that works with people with developmental disabilities, chronic mental illness, or other things that often lead to social exclusion, I’m delighted to be confronted with so many unconscious beliefs that I didn’t know were there.  Yay!  While I sort them out, here’s a past post that’s always fun–love this clip of Eddie Murphy, imagining how white people act when there’s no one of color around.  Sorry, Eddie–but if you know the address of that bank, I’d love to know!

(Originally published April 23, 2010)

I love this clip of Eddie Murphy when he goes undercover as a White Man, to see how white people really act when there are no black people around.

I was reminded of it this morning when three women, including me, ended up in the conference room first waiting for others to join us for a meeting.  One noticed that all of our outfits sort of matched.  I then commented on how mod my colleague’s shirt was, at which point our host noticed that unconsciously she had started dressing in colors to match the logo of her new company. 

I laughed and said “I love meetings with women.”  Indeed, it is not the first time in a professional setting where we have noted each others accessories and commented on fashion before settting down to business.   Serious business.

Maybe it’s our way of establishing relationship before making the deal.

And so I wonder, what do men talk about in professional settings when they find themselves alone?  Anyone?

photo credit magicunlimited.typepad.com

Good news?  These tips apply whether you are traveling around the globe, interacting in a diverse work environment, or, my favorite this time of year, trying to better understand and appreciate the unique traits of key family members over the holidays!

1.  Beware of making assumptions about people based on physical characteristics:  race, ethnicity, age, ability, gender, etc. (That can’t be reiterated enough!)

2.  Do good research in advance, but do not take ‘country guides’ as being the final word.  Individual preferences vary and will trump any group customs, but might be helpful to know that the clock you about to give as a gift to your Chinese host might imply death.

3.  Welcome feedback as a gift.  Thanking someone for his or her suggestions is a great way to solicit ‘insider’ knowledge.  Once you say thanks for the insight, he or she may be willing to share more.  When a business deal is at stake that could be just the ticket to your success.

4.  Embrace your own identity and use that as a platform to communicate with others.  (I statements instead of you statements—as in “that’s so interesting, I do it this way, how do you do it?

5.  Asks questions to understand what motivates others.

6.  Be open to learning, and learn to teach without being judgmental or making the learner feel embarrassed.  Remember Emerson (sic) Everyone is my master because I can learn something from everyone.

7.  Be an Anthropologist.  Ethnographers or Participant Observers are keen to watch the interactions of others closely when approaching new communities or situations.  How are items being used?  How do people greet one another?  It’s a chance to really listen with your whole being.  Think “don’t drink the water in the finger bowl.”

8.  Be sure to try new things, particularly foods when in another country.  But, allow a little latitude when ordering food in restaurants, as in, you may understand the word for lasagna, but it may not be served as you expected…enjoy-seeing how similar concepts are enacted in different countries is part of the fun.  (on the flip side, ff you have allergies or things that don’t allow latitude, like a peanut allergy, bring a dictionary to know key words.)

9.  Be patient with yourself and others.  Anger, unease, defensiveness, etc. may come with the territory.  Just remember, that moment of discomfort is usually when you are at the cusp of learning!  Kind of like in weight lifting—the moment the weight is too much and the muscle fails, is the moment the muscle gets stronger.

10.  Be brave but safe, confident but humble…don’t be afraid to simply open the dictionary to the right page and just show it to the person with whom you are speaking;  learn where the street signs are-sometimes they are on the corner, sometimes on the side of the building, sometimes on the sidewalk.  If you go out alone, bring a piece of paper with the phone number and address where you are staying.

There was a story on NPR last month that showed that despite sharing the same genes, siblings can be completely foreign to each other from a personality perspective.  Not only do they share the same culture, they come from the same gosh darn family….and still sometimes can’t get along. 

You’d think applying some of the basic tenets of Engagement and Inclusion, or Intercultural Communications might help, but…

In intercultural communications, we take responsibility for our actions and our role in an interaction.  We say, “oh, that didn’t work, let me try another approach.”

We don’t say, “You wanna play nice?  You go first.”

In intercultural communications, we learn to recognize when someone’s communication style is different than our own, and we learn to separate the content from the delivery style.

We don’t say “You’re communication style sucks.”

In intercultural communications we learn to assume positive intent first, so that if someone e-mails and texts us on the weekend to confirm a weekend gathering, we think “they must really WANT to reach us and must be more comfortable with this technology assisted communication (or perhaps they are studying Japanese and didn’t say anything…30% of Japanese Send E-Mail First To Ask If They Can Call.  One reason given: “Other person may not like telephone”)

When we look at the missed messages on Monday we don’t think “It was Sunday, why didn’t he/she just pick up the @$%&* phone and call the house if he/she really wanted to talk?

And, finally, in intercultural communications, we might say “tell me the cultural tradition of your beautiful clothing.”

We don’t say “Yeah?!  Well…Your mother dresses you funny!”

Ah, but wait, I just insulted myself.  We have the same mother.

And there lies the deeper difficulty, or perhaps the more profound challenge ultimately yielding the greater reward.

While Engagement and Inclusion and Intercultural Communications are critical for a more productive workplace, and while one hopes that learning to navigate cultural differences at work will promote greater sensitivity overall…at the end of the day these valuable workplace skills, can if one chooses, stay at work.

But family, they are permanent and constant.

Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Okay.  Swallow.  Let me try another approach.  If I can master this, I can do anything!

Happy Holidays.

Photo credit by Regenboog on Flickr

As I watched the buff and scantily clad Brad Pitt and Eric Banna fight each other in the movie Troy the other day, I found my mind wandering to the Chicago based “Babes with Blades,” self described as “a company of women wielding weapons.”

At first I thought, “Oy, I’m old that this is what I think of when staring at Brad Pitt,” but then I realized that wasn’t the point (no pun intended or probably even noticed).

It was that as Helen and Polydora languished and  looked beautiful, the men fought to protect their honor and virtue.  They were completely helpless in and of their own right.

The movie was I imagine historically accurate, and women’s roles in both life and movies have thankfully expanded over the years.

And that’s the connection…In Chicago, it’s the “Babes with Blades” who are best known for choreographing awesome fights with swords, knives, and other sundry weapons.

We defy society’s limitations of women’s roles, including the preconception that strength and power are inappropriate in women. We challenge the traditional definition of femininity and shatter divisive stereotypes…

And while they do it locally, women actors continue to push the boundaries in film as well, with Uma Thurman, Halle Berry, and Angelina Jolie among Parade’s list of the Top 10 Female Action Stars.

In the world of Intercultural Communications, perhaps unconsciously I was registering the overwhelming stereotyping of gender roles in the film, and countering it with strong vibrant images.  Or maybe it’s just that as a strong vibrant woman, I can’t imagine sitting around pining if the person fighting on my behalf (aka Orlando Bloom as Paris) was doing so poorly.

Nothing wrong with a little well-placed “I am woman, Hear me roar!”

Photo credit Broadway World Chicago, from Babes with Blades’ All Female Macbeth.

Photo credit Flixter.com

Brazilian-Guinean singer and dancer Fanta Konate will bring her African Sensory Experience to Chicago from December 1 to 10, 2010 as part of a cultural exchange program sponsored by The Illinois-Sao Paulo Chapter of Partners of the Americas.  A native of Sao Paulo Brazil, Fanta’s public performances of music and dance in schools, with dance companies, and in cultural settings epitomizes the African influence in Brazilian music and dance and highlights parallels to African influence in the arts in Chicago.

“Chicago and Sao Paulo have a common heritage in the Manden culture which spread to Brazil and the United States through the African Diaspora,” said Chris Preissing, Illinois-Sao Paulo Partners Board Member and volunteer coordinator for the Fanta Konate trip.  “It is the goal of this project to use the music and dance of the Manden Culture to engage at risk youths and professionals who work with disadvantaged youths to increase human potential and create environmental sustainability,” added Preissing.

Direct artistic work over the 10 day exchange will reach over 1,000 and include students in Evanston, through the BooCoo Cultural and Music Center, and in Chicago through the Old Town School of Music field trip program, University of Illinois Chicago theater department, Columbia College, Loyola and DePaul Universities. Educational and cultural activities will reach approximately 500 through the Chicago Public Schools, the Kovler Center for Survivors of Torture and more.

Founder of the Africa Vivá Institute, Fanta had her training in the African Ballet styles of “Hamaná,” “Fareta,” “Bolonta,” “Soleil d’Afrique,” and “Sangbarala,” the style of her village. Whether performing deeply traditional West African themes with her sisters and brothers in Troupe Djembedon or with other guest artists and collaborators in the “Contemporary Diaspora” style, Fanta Konatê always delights audiences with her mastery of a variety of timbres, styles and tempos.

Dancer and Singer Fanta Konate is the daughter of Master Djembefola Famoudou Konatê.  Her work represents a fusion of Manden culture often combined with the music therapy of her husband and artistic collaborator Luis Kinugawa.  Their work originated in the “Biomusic Without Borders” work in 1998 in Brazil, and has continued with social projects in Guinea and Sierra Leone from 2000 to 2002 with Non-Profit  Organizations “Warchild,” “Doctors Without Borders,” and “Refugee Children of the World,” training as many as 40 art educators to work with 1,000 to 1,500 refugees at time.

Founded in 1965, Partners of the Americas is a not-for-profit volunteer organization committed to working together as citizen volunteers from Latin America, the Caribbean and the United States to improve the lives of people across the hemisphere. We not only dream of a better world, we roll up our sleeves and make a difference. Illinois-Sao Paulo (IL-SP) Partners is one of 120 Chapters and 60 Partnerships working to foster cooperation across the Western Hemisphere.

For more information visit us at www.illinois-saopaulo-partners.org, or find us on Facebook, Partners of the Americas Illinois-Sao Paulo Chapter.

Looks like a sweet, innocent baby, right?  But if you panned out to get the full picture, you would see a different story.

As the camera pulls away, the baby is sitting on top of a case of tequila that is resting in the basket of a shopping cart to be the right height.  The mom is in front of the cart, facing the baby and holding him around his waste so he doesn’t fall.  She’s bent her head forward to be out of the picture, which places her head right at the baby’s belly button, a sure invitation for the baby to play with her  hair.

The photographer is waving and smiling to get his attention.  No go…looking away.  Nope, eyes closed.  He’s good, but mom’s head’s in the way.  Take 24.  Clerk ready to quit.  Mom ready to cry.  Trip to meet grandma first time in Brazil about to be canceled due to lack of passport photo.

And, voila, the perfect angel picture.

Point is sometimes the immediate image doesn’t paint the full picture, and this is no less true in intercultural communications.

Have you ever thought someone rude or unfriendly, only to find out later English wasn’t his or her first language?  Or how about walking into a business meeting in another country, but not knowing the customs or expectations in a particular context?  And, in moving to the arena of difference based on ability, how can hidden disabilities like chronic pain or illness influence interactions?

But isn’t that the job of the interculturalist to be extra observant and grasp the bigger picture?  How has remembering that helped you in your work?  Are there times when you didn’t grasp the full picture, and it hurt you?